Like many 25-year-old females living in New York I brace for true love every time I step outside my apartment. It's like an autopilot setting. And like many 25-year old females living in New York, dating is this sometimes great, sometimes awful thing we do. To pile onto the mess that is finding true love there's this absurd idea of the "Meet Cute."

This is the story that gets told time after time about how you and your significant other met. To be considered a true Meet Cute, it has to be amusing, adorable, funny, entertaining, take place in a bookstore and/or resemble something out of a Nora Ephron movie.

And it better be freaking cute!

In my two and a half years living New York I've had a grand total of two Meet Cutes, both of which ended abruptly and awkwardly. Let's take a look: 

 

November 14, 2013:

We met on the opening night of a new gallery exhibit in the Meatpacking District. We were both there alone supporting the people running the show and ended up hanging out the whole time. We even got cheese fries at a nearby diner at the end of the night.

All together now: awww...

I do not remember this guy's name and after consulting all of my old journals it looks like he didn't even warrant an entry. Luckily I remember our first date with remarkable detail and I think I can pinpoint why it didn't work out.

First, he took me to one of those underground, need a password, everyone is speaking in hushed whispers speakeasies. A very intimate place for a first date, but that's just me. The drink I ordered cost 18 dollars. I had two.

Second, John Doe let me know that he recently broke off his wedding engagement - recently meaning in the past month. This was said about an hour into our date. Normal people would take this fun fact as their cue to call it a night and head home but that didn't happen. John Doe lived in a high-rise in Chelsea and 23-year old Kelly was kind of dumb.

John Doe showed me the view from his roof, I Instagrammed a picture (17 likes, ayy) and that's when I finally called it a night, leaving Mr. Doe alone with his skyline view.

He didn't ask for a second date. He didn't even text back. Needless to say, I'm not broken up about it. Again, I didn't even journal about it, and I journal about every guy who makes eye contact with me on the subway.

 

August 2, 2013:

I left the bar early and was waiting for the train by myself. He stood next to me and we bonded over our love-hate relationship with the G train. He asked for my number and we parted ways at Bedford-Nostrand.

Just like the movies!!!!

Ok, I remember this guy's name,  Lewis! I know this because for some reason I still have his texts saved. Don't worry, I'll send him a link to this post.

Lewis was perfectly nice. We went to a beer garden in Brooklyn and had a perfectly nice chat.

We talked about our interests, his affinity for soft jazz, our jobs, our families, among other topics. It was a very nice night. And that's about it. Again, I have no journal entry about Lewis because, speaking for myself, there was absolutely no spark.

At the end of the date I hugged him goodnight, headed toward my train and thought that I won't be that surprised or mad if I never hear from him again.

I assumed he felt the same way about our date's dud status but he texted me the next morning asking to meet up again (I know, I know, a guy asking for a second date? HOW AWFUL). Today in this same situation, I would give Lewis a second shot, but 23-year old Kelly was not having it and quickly shut it down.

 

My Meet Cutes didn't have a leg to stand on, probably because I was so obsessed with the idea of actually having a Meet Cute to report back to my friends. Today when it comes to The Story, I'm all about the mantra, IDGAF.

When I'm on Tinder and see in a guy's bio, "Let's not tell our friends where we met..." I automatically assume he has no confidence.

Yes, this is a huge and probably unfair assumption but there it is.

If your next relationship begins with a Meet Cute, great! Cute! Amazing! You found someone who enjoys your company and wants to kiss you!

And if it doesn't, great! Cute! Amazing! You still found someone who enjoys your company and wants to kiss you!