Skip the hating on Valentine's Day

By Julia Allison | Special to amNewYork

February 12, 2007

Last week I received an e-mail from a reader named Maria, who wrote that Valentine's Day made her "want to vomit." She and most of her friends were single, she explained, and they found it "gross how people try to have a booty call or boyfriend" just in time for this particular holiday.

She ended her missive with a plea: "Is there any way you could write something not cheesy but not so bashing for this time of year?" Hmmm. Not cheesy but not so bashing. That's a fine line to walk, Miss Maria.

Personally, I have always loved and continue to love Valentine¹s Day. It's not that I've had such mind-blowing romantic experiences -- I spent one February 14th eating frosting out of a can by myself. Doesn't matter! I'm still a fan.

In fact, the idea that anyone could get cranky about a holiday created to celebrate love is beyond me. What's with the pent-up rage? The bitterness?

The cynicism? Complain all you want about 'commercialization,' but there's nothing wrong with a reminder to treat the loved ones in our lives with a little bit of extra care and consideration, and sure, some flowers and a card too.

According to a Telefora survey, 79% of Americans consider themselves 'romantic' -- and yet, during 2006, 48% didn't send flowers, 66% neglected to write a love letter, 42% didn't plan a romantic holiday, and 32% didn't cook a romantic meal.

How sweet of us. Despite the whining, it seems like we do need a date on the calendar to jog our romantic memories. And really, why complain about it?

There are so many other things to criticize in this world.

If you're grumbling because you don't have a significant other, there are plenty of other people in your life who might appreciate a Valentine's Day celebration -- your best friend, your sister, your grandmother -- even yourself.

On my Valentine's Day list? A cute red or pink iPod, Laura Mercier coconut body scrub, Molton Brown rose hand lotion and an enormous bouquet of roses.

And no, despite trendy rumblings of the 'roses are cheesy' crowd, no woman is ever, ever upset at receiving a bouquet.

As for a love letter, forget the Duane-Reade Hallmark cards and don¹t even THINK about sending an e-mail. Instead, go down to Kate's Paperie or Papyrus and find something really beautiful and unique, then actually write on it. You know, with a pen.

While you're at it, send a Valentine to the people who most deserve to hear you say 'I love you' - your mom and dad. Aww.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Email Julia at Julia@JuliaAllison.com.