Late, but neccessary: Grading the final presidential debate
By Meg Boyle
(Better late than never, right? Right???)
Demerit: Joe the Plumber
STOP calling him Joe the Plumber! Hes a real person, not a character on Bob
Gold Star: Breaking News: Joe the Plumber in Bed
OK, that was kind of funny. You win this round, Keith Olbermann. But Ill win the war.
Demerit (or Gold Star?): The CNN Uncommitted Voters Reaction Ticker
It says absolutely nothing of merit, yet I cant stop watching Demerit: Nattering Nabobs of Well, You Get It
Honey, come here. Its the strangest thing: McCains doing really well. Look, hes putting Obama on the defensive, hes reaching out, hes (almost) avoiding all senior moments he may actually win this one! Wait, what was that Bob just asked? He wants them to get negative on each other? Oh, well.
Demerit: Ayers and ACORN
Ill ask you to answer first, Sen. Obama. Why would the country be better off if your running mate became president rather than his running mate? Youre kidding me, right?
Demerit: The Supreme Court Question Litmus Test Question
No presidential candidate would ever say that he would not appoint a Supreme Court justice who differed with him on abortion. Come on, Bob. You can do better than that.
Gold Star within a Demerit: Nobodys pro-abortion.
Finally. My skin crawls every time McCain uses that word.
Demerit within a Demerit: You know, thats been stretched by the pro-abortion movement in America to mean almost anything. Thats the extreme pro-abortion position, quote, health.
Lovely, John. Theres nothing extreme about protecting the life and health of the women who bare Americas children. Pro-Life my eye.
Demerit: Cheshire Cat Grins and Eye Rolls
At least try to act like you dont despise each other.
Gold Star: Huh???
The MSNBC focus group thought McCain won. Foxs focus group thought Obama won. When did we hit Wonderland?
Demerit: Tom Daschle Skeeves Me Out
Hey, Tom: Harry Potter called. He wants his glasses back.
And now, the Gold Star of all Gold Stars: I want to get in a question on education.
YES! Finally!! Thank you, Bob!
Demerit within a Gold Star: My brother sent me an email the next day asking the difference between charter schools and school vouchers.
A simple, three-line answer would have sufficed. I think I went on for about three pages. Nerd. Alert.