Nude yoga to blame for Kim Kardashian's failed marriage?
Are we supposed to feel satisfied that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries' marriage is over after three months because of what we saw on Sunday's premiere of "Kourtney and Kim Take New York"?
E!'s hour-long episode - which has been billed as a vehicle to show us the "problems" lurking within the marriage - showed us nothing but a bunch of shallow scripted ticks that supposedly caused riffs between the publicity-obsessed pair.
Yes, there were awkward jabs the basketballer made about his wife eating too much wedding cake, and his displeasure at the fact that Kim's baby nephew Mason's room was so close to theirs, but it seems the real kicker that ended things was something so absurd and scripted-beyond-comprehension: a naked yoga class.
Kris - who had said last week that he's not pleased with the boorish way he's presented on the show - exploded when he walked in on his wife, her sister Kourtney and some pals being instructed by a nude man in the Gansevoort Park Avenue suite where they lived during shooting.
"That's disgusting. This is my home. This is disrespectful," Kris raged after witnessing the scene.
Then, naturally, Kris got more personal, telling Kim he can no longer live with Kourtney. "[She] cannot live with us anymore. I will personally pay for her to have a room on a different floor."
From there, the couple's demise was convieniently swift.
"I love you so much," Humphries told Kim. "But Mason's playpen is five feet from my room. We got naked dudes here ... I just can't get done what I need to get done here in New York. I think I am going to go to Minnesota and train. I gotta be ready for the season."
"I don't really know what to say," Kardashian said. "We're going to live separate? Like long-distance marriage?"
And so "the end" was born.
Follow Style/Buzz/Special Sections Editor Perrie Samotin on Twitter: @PerrieWS