500 Clown Christmas Diving into the dark and light sides of the consumer-driven yet still touching Christmas season, 3 clowns and a 3 piece band throw a celebration complete with a holiday toast, gift giving and live music. Ages 12 & up. Thru Dec. 30; Tues. – Sat. at 7.30pm and Sat. & Sun. at 4pm. PERFORMANCE SPACE 122, 150 1st Ave. at E. 9th St. www.500clown.com. For tickets, visit www.ps122.org or call 212-352-3101. $20, $15 students & seniors, $10 members.

Art Attack Art is everywhere: in the parks, on the walls, in our favorite story time books. Read stories about Picasso and Andy Warhol and Harold’s purple crayon. There will also be face painting for kids. Ages 3 – 7. Sat., Jan. 19 from noon – 1pm. MCNALLY ROBINSON BOOKSELLERS, 52 Prince St., bet Lafayette & Mulberry. 212-274-1160. Free.

Flag Football During the winter months, Manhattan Youth will offer a touch football clinic outdoors for students in grades 5-10. Jan. 6 – March; Sundays from 11am – 1pm. PIER 40, Houston St. & the Hudson River. 212 766-1104.

Happy Birthday, Rubber Duckie You’re invited to a birthday party for Ernie’s favorite bird. Sing songs and read stories about Rubber Duckie and his feathery cousins. After story time, kids will adopt and decorate their own rubber duckies. Ages 3-7. Sat., Jan. 12 from noon – 1pm. MCNALLY ROBINSON BOOKSELLERS, 52 Prince St., bet Lafayette & Mulberry. 212-274-1160. Free.

Lilly’s Purple Plastic Purse A theatrical work created especially for children and adapted for the stage from the popular children’s books “Lilly’s Purple Plastic Purse,” “Julius, Baby of the World” and “Chester’s Way” by Kevin Henkes. Ages 5 & up. Thru Feb. 3; Saturdays & Sundays at 12 & 2pm. MANHATTAN CHILDREN’S THEATRE, 52 White St., 1st floor, bet Broadway & Church Sts. 212-352-3101. www.theatermania.com. $20, $15 for ages 2-17 & seniors.

My Undying Love: An Amusement A one-act opera for children and adults about an adolescent girl’s fantasy-play with her dolls and stuffed animals. Fri. & Sat., Jan. 18 & 19 at 8pm. THE CONSTRUCTION COMPANY, 10 E. 18th St., 3rd floor, bet 5th Ave. & Broadway. Call for reservations. 212-924-7882. www.theconstructioncompany.org. $15, $10 students & seniors.

Pirate Christmas Join the Maritime Pirates for a story about the true enjoyment of Christmas, Christmas stockings, pirate tattoos, singing and more. All ages. Fri., Dec. 28 at 3pm and Sat., Dec. 29 at 1 & 3pm. SOUTH STREET SEAPORT MUSEUM, 12 Fulton St. Reservations required. Call 212-748-8786 or visit www.southstreetseaportmuseum.org. $15, $10 members.

PS 89 School Tours Adults only, no children please. Bring a picture ID for security. Wed., Jan 30 & Thurs., Feb. 28 at 9pm in the school cafeteria. PS 89, 201 Warren St. 212-571-5659. www.ps89.org.

Stories and Songs Infants, toddlers, preschoolers and accompanying adults share the joy of music and storytelling in this multi-week program introducing and integrating musical performance and creative storytelling in children’s lives. Two sessions available: 14 Mondays from Jan. 7 – April 21 or 16 Wednesdays from Jan. 9 – April 23. Four 40-minute time slots available: 9:30–10:10am for children 6-12 months old; 10:20–11am for children 15 months to 2 years; 11:10-11:50am for children 2 years & older; Noon-12:40pm for mixed ages. MEETING ROOM, The Verdesian, 211 North End Ave., bet. Warren & Murray Sts. Mondays are $210; Wednesdays are $240. 212-267-9700 x348 or 366.

The Three Kings The light from a star will lead the Three Kings to Teatro SEA to celebrate one of the most important Latin American Holidays for children, Three Kings Day. The first 1,000 kids to visit will get to meet the Three Kings and receive a present. TEATRO SEA, Los Kabayitos Puppet & Children’s Theater, 107 Suffolk St., 2nd floor, bet. Delancey & Rivington Sts. Sun., Jan. 6 from 3-5pm. 212-529-1545. www.sea-online.info. Free.

Turn off the Lights, Now! Thomas Edison invented the light bulb on Dec. 31, 1879 and kids have been forgetting to turn them off ever since. Read about great inventions and inventors and then invent your own machines with pipe cleaners, bobbins and rubber bands. Ages 3-7. Sat., Dec. 29 from noon–1 pm. MCNALLY ROBINSON BOOKSELLERS, 52 Prince St. Free.

Witch Christmas Two evil hoarders fill their creepy old house with useless stuff, until a missed phone call prompts them to turn over a new leaf. Unable to part with their junk, they adopt three innocent children from the local orphanage to help them. Performance is appropriate for children and adults. Sat. & Sun., Dec. 29 & 30 at 8pm. MANHATTAN THEATRE SOURCE, 177 MacDougal St., just below 8th St. 212-501-4751. $18.

Would You Like to See Your Event in the Downtown Express Kids Listings? Listings requests may be e-mailed to casey@downtownexpress.com. Please provide the date, time, location, price and a description of the event. Information may also be mailed to Casey Easterling at 145 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10013-1548. Requests must be received two weeks before the event is to be published. Questions, call 646-452-2505.