I resigned this spring as a Democratic district leader in Westchester. I had to, since my husband and I made the unusual decision to return to the city long before our kids fled the nest—the local schools weren’t safe for our trans 11-year-old. But, more importantly, I resigned because I am as disappointed in the Democratic Party as I am disillusioned by our experience in a solidly blue suburb.
In the 2024 election, President Trump and his supporters spent an astounding $222 million on anti-trans and anti-LGBTQ+ advertising, weaponizing transphobia with ads like “Kamala Harris is for they/them. Donald Trump is for you,” and making “transgender ideology” their primary wedge issue. The way they villainized my son and his community terrified me—and inspired me to canvass for the New York Equal Rights Amendment. Governor Hochul was a prominent backer of this constitutional amendment and steered more than $1M toward the “Yes on NY Prop 1” campaign, which aimed to make it near-impossible for future administrations to strip away prohibitions on discrimination in the Empire State. The bright spot on a very dark election night last year was that my fellow New Yorkers voted overwhelmingly in favor of enshrining these protections in our state constitution. At least my son will be safe here, I thought.
Since January, however, a drumbeat of anti-trans executive orders, discriminatory actions, court rulings, and “poison pill” riders has ramped my anxiety to eleven. Democrats—including both our senators—have voted with the GOP in the shutdown battle, and Party strategists are pushing to leave trans Americans out to dry.
Here in New York, the Legislature has done its job, passing three bills to shore up state laws in response to this onslaught. The Shield Law 2.0 would protect providers and recipients of reproductive and gender-affirming care from investigation, prosecution, and punishment by other states. The New York Health Information Privacy Act would make it harder for hostile states or the federal government to access our electronic health information, like smartwatch, FitBit, and period-tracking app data. The Hospital Transparency bill would give New Yorkers the tools to find out whether hospitals provide the services they need prior to admission and identify gaps in access to this critical, life-saving healthcare.
However, those bills have been sitting on Governor Hochul’s desk for months. She has failed to sign the first despite ample opportunity—and threatened to supersede the collective will of the State Senate and Assembly by vetoing the last two. This lack of action speaks louder than any speech she could give.
As the mother of a trans child, her betrayal stings. My son is not a semantic argument or political hot potato. He’s a middle schooler who wants nothing more than to live an authentic life free from discrimination. If his safety can’t be guaranteed, or even prioritized, in my beloved home state, can I protect him anywhere? Why is the leadership of my party failing to protect my son? The governor’s inexplicable delay in signing these bills only amplifies the sense of abandonment trans New Yorkers and those who love them feel from the Democratic Party here and on a national level.
We need a sign from the top that Democrats have not abandoned us. So pick up the pen, Governor Hochul. With one stroke, you can reassure this vulnerable community—and cement your legacy as a fighter for gender and reproductive justice.
Ali Moss is a former Democratic district leader writing a book about raising a trans kid in Trump’s America.
