By Ed Koch
Mission Impossible III (-)
Feh is the right word to describe this so-called action movie. Tom Cruise should retire, become a stay-at-home dad taking care of his new baby and allow Katie Holmes to continue with her acting career. She’s alright, not yet terrific, but not bad either. I hope my venomous pen directed at Cruise is simply because of his acting and the terrible script. He is the producer of the movie, as well as principal actor and responsible for the miserable package. I hope I’m not influenced by his recent behavior, particularly on the Oprah Winfrey show. But, even if I am, it wouldn’t be terrible. I believe artists, like everyone else, can and in my book, should be judged by their total persona. Cruise’s acting fame is mostly related to his face, mischievous smile and big teeth. But, we’ve had enough already, and it’s time for him to go.
Those attracted to action movies should know that if they go to see this film, while there are unending special effects – at one point, you think you are watching Spiderman III – they become boring . So, now to the minimum plot. Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise), special agent, and his posse, Luther (Ving Rhames) and Declan (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) are seeking to rescue Julia (Michelle Monaghan) who is held captive by arms dealer Owen Davian (Phillip Seymour Hoffman). Davian is looking for the “rabbit’s foot,” a mysterious weapon hidden in Shanghai. Rescuing Julia puts Ethan and Lindsey Farris (Keri Russell) into more dangerous situations than any “Perils of Pauline” movie ever unreeled. It is not only all ridiculous, it is all so juvenile and boring.
The Da Vinci Code (-)
I did not read Dan Brown’s novel on which this film is based nor do I intend to read it. Many people who denounced the book and sought to put down the movie, directed by Ron Howard, smelled blood after the film’s poor reviews at Cannes. I was rooting for its success but, sorry to say, the negative reviews were warranted.
The book probably explains more of the details, but the screenplay contains lots of holes and is occasionally difficult to follow. Tom Hanks, with his distracting long hair, gives one of his worst performances to date as the Harvard professor, Robert Langdon. Jean Reno, portraying Inspector Bezu Fache, does well and against type – he usually plays the criminal. Audrey Tautou, who reminds many of Audrey Hepburn, is no more than okay in her portrayal of French policewoman Sophie Neveu. The actor who dominates the film is Ian McKellen in his role as Sir Leigh Teabing.
Everyone knows the plot so I won’t restate it. Some of the elements of the movie, particularly the relationship between Teabing’s character and his manservant and plane pilot, Remy (Jean-Yves Berteloot), were reminiscent of a James Bond film.Fear was expressed by some that the Catholic Church should worry about the movie’s impact on audiences. Not to worry. Although everyone acknowledges that the book and the film are works of fiction, the real victim in the film is Opus Dei, the Catholic organization depicted as a cult of murderers. I would be angry if the Jewish Lubuvacher sect was portrayed in such a sordid manner. Albinos, born with a lack of skin pigmentation, may also be offended after seeing Paul Bettany’s portrayal of Silas, the albino monk who flagellates himself and commits murder.
According to The Washington Post, “The Da Vinci Code” is estimated to have grossed $224 million worldwide, second to the $253 million debut of “Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith.” For me, seeing the film was not a wasted evening, but it left much to be desired. But who knows, you may enjoy it.
