Aquarius Your stubborn sense of justice will provide a much-needed moral compass to the confused focus group charged with evaluating an exciting new flavor of frozen yogurt.
Pisces Look at the price tag and think about the cost, before purchasing that cheap thrill.
Aries A prisoner of love makes a lousy cell mate, and has little chance of contributing to society after release (or escape!).
Taurus Your liberal use of the oxford comma will result in an email whose message is unintentionally altered, to effects both comedic and tragic.
Gemini The planets have aligned to present you with three decisive moments, all happening before the day is out. Be confident, act swiftly and claim your just rewards.
Cancer Heed that still small voice that tells you not to beat yourself up, when unexpectedly requiring the services of a pricey after-hours locksmith.
Leo A bitter rival’s kind gesture is like that viral video of the cat that chased away the attacking dog: a welcome aberration that shouldn’t be relied upon to repeat itself.
Virgo Wisdom gained in hindsight does little to undo damage done in haste.
Libra Your skeptical nature and your nurturing instinct battle for supremacy, when a friend in need makes a dubious but desperate request.
Scorpio Freeze your assets, curb your enthusiasm and temper your expectations this weekend — and you’ll reap a rich reward, come Monday.
Sagittarius Slices and snippets of people and places from your distant past are about to reemerge in odd but pleasant ways.
Capricorn Words spoken in anger are like a ruptured appendix — sure to leave a scar, even when removed from the victim with surgical precision.
