CPCS: His beef, a bitter pill to swallow
A 47-year-old male was arrested by uniformed officers of the 10th Precinct at around 10pm on Sat., March 16 — when he was caught attempting to flee the premises of Western Beef Supermarket (431 W. 16th St., btw. 9th & 10th Aves.). Criminal Possession of a Controlled Substance was the charge — and that wasn’t referring to the $163 worth of beer and miscellaneous meats he was caught with. The changes stemmed (and stuck) from the 51 Xanax pills found in the perp’s back pocket. Arresting officers noted the buzzed beef thief didn’t have a prescription for the anti-anxiety tablets (or a shopping list for the meat).
Petty Larceny: Long arm of law nabs leggings thief
Here’s hoping he at least had the svelte form to pull it off. A 22-year-old male was arrested just before 4pm on Sun., March 24 — shortly after he was caught red-handed, with two pairs of navy blue leggings that had been swiped off the shelves of American Apparel (181 8th Ave.), and placed in the would-be-fashionable lad’s book bag.
Grand Larceny: Grabbed from behind (the couch)
What is the world coming to when you can’t go to a club smack-dab in the middle of one of our globe’s largest cities, and leave your bag unattended? That’s what one 28-year-old resident of Queens might have been asking herself — when, at 3:30am on Sat., March 23, she discovered that her handbag was missing. The victim (definitely clueless, and perhaps tipsy) left her bag on a couch, turned her back, and ten minutes later turned around to discover the bag missing. Her complaint noted that a canvass of the popular nightclub (Marquee, at 289 10th Ave.) was not conducted, perhaps since the crime happened so close to last call — by which point one supposes the bag’s contents were long gone. Missing, and not recovered: an iPhone, valued at $700. Total losses: $1,040.
Grand Larceny: Scammed at the cellular level
At around 9:30am on Mon., March 25, a 39-year-old Times Square area resident was approached by a young man who forcibly removed an iPhone (valued at $250) from her hands. As the perpetrator left the scene, the victim was approached by another man — who assured her he could get her phone back (if she gave him money). Based on a description, a canvass of the nearby area was conducted, which led to the apprehension of the for-profit Good Samaritan. The phone thief, however, was not found.
—Scott Stiffler
