ASSAULT: Criminal commuting customer caught | While dining at Triple Crown (330 Seventh Ave., btw. W. 29th & W. 30th Sts.) on Thurs., Jan. 5, a would-be customer consumed $60.43 worth of food and beverage, according to the establishment’s manager. When his waitress presented him with a bill to that effect just before midnight, the man simply got up and left without settling the tab. When the manager and the waitress noticed and followed him out to confront him about the bill, an altercation ensued during which the customer caused minor injuries to the waitress’ forearm. After this incident, the restaurant staff then tailed the attacker to Penn Station, where the 33-year-old was arrested by the Amtrak Police Department.
PETIT LARCENY: When Dove’s Crime | On Fri., Jan 6, one thief attempted to enact a hygienic heist at CVS (272 Eighth Ave., btw. W. 23rd & W. 24th Sts.), by trying to give security the slip while stealing some soap. The store’s manager reports that shortly before 3pm, he witnessed the man grab some items off of a shelf, and stealthily put them into a Starbucks bag. When he started heading towards the door, attempting to leave without paying, the manager stopped him, and the man dropped the bag, releasing the Doves — or six bottles of Dove body wash, anyway (valued at $54). He then exited the store, but to no avail; the 49-year-old Bronx resident was arrested by authorities shortly thereafter.
CRIMINAL MISCHIEF: Wrapscallion at large | A Krampus-y criminal wielded open fire of their own on Thurs., Jan. 5 — but instead of roasting chestnuts, they engaged in some holiday cheer-dampening vandalism. At around 5pm, a 54-year-old woman discovered that an unknown party had burned the holiday decorations off of the door of her residence in a 400 block of West Chelsea (the door was still covered in festive wrapping paper for the holidays). For her part, the victim told police that she was cooking at the time of the incident, and therefore did not notice the smell of the fire. She only realized what happened when her neighbor knocked on her door to let her know the decorations were destroyed. Luckily, there was no additional damage to the door itself, though unfortunately video cameras were not present at the location to capture the Grinches in action.
PETIT LARCENY: The great vape escape | It seems, on Fri., Jan. 6, the proprietors of New Jubilee Vape (219 W. 14th St., btw. Seventh & Eighth Aves.) discovered what most people already hold as infallible truth: People who vape are totally the worst. At 5:40pm an employee was showing off some (probably goofy-looking) gear to a prospective customer — a G Pen and a PAX 2 Vaporizer, which research confirms are not just a bunch of nonsense words, but pieces of equipment intended for real adults, valued at $160 and $225, respectively. At some point, the customer asked to take the items with him, claiming that he was going to show them to his “girlfriend” (which should have set off a red flag too, honestly). Instead, he then ran out of the store with the merchandise in tow, taking off down W. 14th St. (heading toward Sixth Ave.), presumably leaving thick plumes of sickly-sweet smelling “vape juice” in his wake for passersby to choke on. Naturally, the store owner has security cameras installed and video evidence of the incident — because even he knows not to trust anyone who vapes. And, on the off chance the perp is reading and wondering: No, it’s definitely not “cool if [you] vape” in jail.
—SEAN EGAN
THE 10th PRECINCT: Located at 230 W. 20th St. (btw. Seventh & Eighth Aves.). Commander: Capt. Paul Lanot. Main number: 212-741-8211. Community Affairs: 212-741-8226. Crime Prevention: 212-741-8226. Domestic Violence: 212-741-8216. Youth Officer: 212-741-8211. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-924-3377. Detective Squad: 212-741-8245. The Community Council meets on the last Wed. of the month, 7pm, at the 10th Precinct or other locations to be announced.
MIDTOWN SOUTH PRECINCT: Located at 357 W. 35th St. (btw. Eighth & Ninth Aves.). Inspector: Russel J. Green. Call 212-239-9811. Community Affairs: 212-239-9846. Crime Prevention: 212-239-9846. Domestic Violence: 212-239-9863. Youth Officer: 212-239-9817. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-239-9836. Detective Squad: 212-239-9856. The Community Council meets on the third Thurs. of the month, 7pm, at the New Yorker Hotel (481 Eighth Ave., btw. W. 34th & W. 35th St.). Visit midtownsouthcc.org.
THE 13th PRECINCT: Located at 230 E. 21st St. (btw. Second & Third Aves.). Deputy Inspector: Brendan Timoney. Call 212-477-7411. Community Affairs: 212-477-7427. Crime Prevention: 212-477-7427. Domestic Violence: 212-477-3863. Youth Officer: 212-477-7411. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-477-4380. Detective Squad: 212-477-7444. The Community Council meets on the third Tues. of the month, 6:30pm, at the 13th Precinct.
CASH FOR GUNS | $100 cash will be given (no questions asked) for each handgun, assault weapon or sawed-off shotgun, up to a maximum payment of $300. Guns are accepted at any Police Precinct, PSA or Transit District.
