Assault: E train platform
A young woman who had just stepped off the the E train was making her way toward the 23rd St. & Eighth Ave. exit at around 8:15 p.m. on Tues., Sept. 16 — when she was approached by a male, unknown to her, who struck her in the left shoulder with a closed fist, then threw her against the wall. The alert victim, who complained of shoulder and back pain, was able to describe the perp, but refused assistance, assuring responding officers that she would seek medical attention on her own.
Fraudulent Accosting: No laptop beyond bubble wrap
Officers arrested a 52-year-old man, after observing him on the northwest corner of 14 St. & Eighth Ave. at around 3 p.m. on Wed., Sept. 17, in the act of attempting to scam a passerby. The novel but poorly executed ruse involved presenting his would-be customer with a great deal on a laptop — which was, in fact, a book hidden behind layers of black tape and bubble wrap, covered with a few computer logo stickers to further complete the illusion. When confronted, the defendant was able to produce neither a laptop nor a “license to act as a general vendor to sell items.” He did, however, possess a 16 oz. Budweiser, which he was observed consuming as he attempted to pawn off the supposedly valuable electronic device.
Theft of Services: Final straw at last call
The designated driver was an NYPD officer, for two boozehounds who tried to bail on their tab. In the first incident, taking place at just before 4 a.m. on Sat., Sept. 20, a 28-year-old male was bused, when presented with a bill for $1,625.27 by a heretofore-accommodating barkeep at a West Chelsea watering hole.
Elsewhere, specifically at 1 Oak (453 W. 17th St., btw. 9th & 10th Aves.), a well-lubricated 25-year-old female tried to stiff the joint for 12 bottles of Dom Perignon (Luminous collection) Champagne, when she admitted having no means or ability to pay the $13,718.25 bill. After being taken into custody just after 5:30 a.m. on Wed., Sept. 17, the party-pooped perp did have the wherewithal to request a lawyer, leading police to note she was “unable to be debriefed.”
—Scott Stiffler
