CRIMINAL POSSESSION OF A CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE: Contraband cornucopia | In most situations honesty is the best policy — though it can be, on occasion, a thoroughly mediocre (or even subpar) one. Take the case of this 35-year-old Queens man, for instance: On Thurs., Oct. 20, the shifty suspect was spotted by police at about 8:45pm at the OUT Hotel (510 W. 42nd St., btw. 10th & 11th Aves.). Upon inspection, police discovered a number of suspicious substances in his possession. They weren’t left to wonder what they were for long, however. “It’s meth. It’s GHB. It’s cocaine,” the man said bluntly to the authorities. His straightforwardness was repaid with a similarly matter-of-fact arrest.
HARASSMENT: Stream of conscienceless | Though most people don’t hesitate to thank God for Fridays, one woman could tell early on that Oct. 21 was most certainly not a day worth praising, when her parade was unexpectedly rained on, by showers of the golden variety. The 27-year-old New Jersey woman was walking up the stairs from the 14th St. A train subway station at around 8:45am, when she felt someone tap her on the shoulder — a Good Samaritan, kindly alerting her to the fact that some other guy standing behind her was casually urinating on her back. Realizing he’d been made, the “number one” criminal zipped up his package and fled southbound on Eighth Ave., leaving the confused and disturbed woman to contemplate her sad, smelly situation. To make matters worse, a police canvas yielded negative results, and cameras were not present on the scene to capture the pervy, peeing perp.
PETIT LARCENY: Go-getter got him | While the boys in blue are usually the best line of defense against crime, sometimes you’ve gotta take matters into your own hands (non-vigilante style, of course). That’s what one employee of a Rite Aid (282 Eighth Ave., at W. 24th St.) did after he saw a man conceal a 12-pack of Coors (estimated value: $10) and remove the property from the store without paying at 10:30am on Fri., Oct. 21. Upon seeing this, the 34-year-old employee took to action, approaching the early-morning boozer and performing a civilian’s arrest on the perp — actions later endorsed by the police when they processed the 43-year-old upstate New York resident.
PETIT LARCENY: Slid right on by | Another man was lucky that the staffers of the Duane Reade at 131 Eighth Ave. (btw. W. 16th & W. 17th Sts.) weren’t so tenacious in their theft prevention, as it made his life a whole lot easier when he stole $125 worth of toiletries from the location on Sat., Oct. 22. At around 10:30am, the man walked into the store and took eight six-count packages of Dove soap and six tubes of Crest toothpaste. While he was observed doing this by an employee, when leaving the store he confidently declared, “You don’t have the right to search my bag” — and apparently he was right, as he strolled right on out of the store unscathed, with his hygienic haul in tow. While the man wasn’t arrested, the police report confirmed that the store has video footage of the incident, so there is a chance he might see justice at some point.
CRIMINAL TRESSPASS: Bullet, un-dodged | At about 5:30pm on Sat., Oct. 22, a man was discovered, loitering in the lobby of an apartment building on the 400 block of W. 17th St. without permission or authority to do so, near signage that clearly stated that no trespassing was allowed, and that those who violated the policy were subject to arrest. “I’m visiting my friend,” said the 21-year-old by way of explanation for his presence in the building — though the authorities didn’t quite believe his less-than-detailed tale. Upon further inspection, it was discovered that the man had “alleged Adderall” in a Ziploc bag in his sock, as well as a loose .22 caliber bullet. These totally unsuspicious items likely didn’t help the man’s case, and he was, in accordance with the sign, arrested.
—SEAN EGAN
THE 10th PRECINCT: Located at 230 W. 20th St. (btw. Seventh & Eighth Aves.). Commander: Capt. Paul Lanot. Main number: 212-741-8211. Community Affairs: 212-741-8226. Crime Prevention: 212-741-8226. Domestic Violence: 212-741-8216. Youth Officer: 212-741-8211. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-924-3377. Detective Squad: 212-741-8245. The Community Council meets on the last Wed. of the month, 7pm, at the 10th Precinct or other locations to be announced.
THE 13th PRECINCT: Located at 230 E. 21st St. (btw. Second & Third Aves.). Deputy Inspector: Brendan Timoney. Call 212-477-7411. Community Affairs: 212-477-7427. Crime Prevention: 212-477-7427. Domestic Violence: 212-477-3863. Youth Officer: 212-477-7411. Auxiliary Coordinator: 212-477-4380. Detective Squad: 212-477-7444. The Community Council meets on the third Tues. of the month, 6:30pm, at the 13th Precinct.
CASH FOR GUNS | $100 cash will be given (no questions asked) for each handgun, assault weapon or sawed-off shotgun, up to a maximum payment of $300. Guns are accepted at any Police Precinct, PSA or Transit District.