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'Glee's most unrealistic moments of NYC life

"Glee" will sing its last songs on Friday. The show has gone through so many ups and downs over the years between its mixing of NYC and Lima, Ohio. "Glee" has never exactly been known for its realism, and while we can't speak for Lima, we are New Yorkers.

Leaving out the giant loft apartment that changes residents without a lease (this would exclude pretty much every show on television) and all the kids from the same high school going to the same prestigious dramatic school, we broke down the show's most unrealistic parts here in NYC. From singing without being arrested in NYC's biggest tourist attractions to a Vogue editor who goes to her intern's apartment in Brooklyn on Thanksgiving, we're here for a good, hard look at NYC reality, kids.

Glee-clubbers sing through all of New York's tourist attractions

The first-ever episode in New York, New York
Photo Credit: FOX

The first-ever episode in New York, New York was actually filmed in NYC. Admittedly, the Glee-clubbers' mash-up "I Love New York/New York, New York" is the dream of every kid from Nowheresville, and their excitement is truly adorable. But they hop between Washington Square Park, Columbus Circle, Central Park and Times Square, which is physically impossible. And they sing on places like an empty Columbus Circle fountain and the TKTS booth and they aren't arrested. Things aren't getting off to a realistic start here.

Cassandra really believes in Rachel

As a young acting student at the fictional
Photo Credit: FOX

As a young acting student at the fictional NYADA, Rachel has a dance instructor named Cassandra July. Cassandra tortures our Rachel, which unfortunately is very realistic. In fact, Cassandra even adds rum to her smoothie after learning a student has gotten a Broadway part. Yep, we've all been there in our respective careers.

But things take a turn for the unrealistic at the end of the season, when she tells Rachel she was only hard on her because she recognized on day one that Rachel had what it took to succeed and pushed Rachel because she believed in her. Sorry, but no. Even if this is true, no dance instructor in ultra-competitive NYC would ever, ever deliver a line like this, unless maybe it was at a funeral, and even then it would not be heartfelt.

A random intern's makeover video is picked up for

Photo Credit: FOX

"Glee" may take liberties with show business, but it goes off the rails with Kurt's experience at Vogue. Admittedly, Sarah Jessica Parker is pretty much perfectly cast as Vogue editor Isabelle Wright. But singing? At Vogue?!

Fine, moving on: Rachel and Kurt are caught talking about what they would do with the items in the Vogue closet for a makeover. Rather than be fired on the spot (or at least reduced to humiliating tears), Isabelle decides to make a music video makeover of Rachel as a marketing strategy.

Leaving aside why an editorial intern would be involved in a marketing video, Kurt is eventually given credit for the idea. Let's just repeat that: An intern is given credit for an idea. What is this, "Big?!" Please don't teach children this is real, "Glee," you will only crush them when they really arrive.

A Vogue editor goes to an intern's house on Thanksgiving

After all that, things got even more ridiculous
Photo Credit: FOX

After all that, things got even more ridiculous in the Thanksgiving episode. After hearing that Isabelle has no plans (OK, probably believable), Kurt invites her to his giant loft in Brooklyn and she accepts. Not only that, she invites friends from the fashion world (and they all fit in a 19-year-old's apartment).

(Ed. note: Let it go about the apartment), and they all come, too (albeit wet from rain or something, which weirdly makes sense). To top it all off, Isabelle then offers realistic, rational advice for Kurt and Blaine.

Let's break this down: First, Isabelle would spend Thanksgiving drinking because no Vogue editor is going to eat all that food. Second, the words "come to my apartment in Brooklyn for Thanksgiving" from an intern would mean nothing to Isabelle. Third, why are her friends there? Why didn't they just have their own (probably liquid) dinner? Fourth, a Vogue editor not only giving advice on an intern's life, but realistic and rational advice?! Kids, please go watch "Gossip Girl" for a healthy dose of realism.

Rachel gets a part in "Funny Girl," Santana is her understudy

After spending a few months in NYC, Rachel,
Photo Credit: FOX

After spending a few months in NYC, Rachel, living in a giant loft (Ed. note: stop focusing on the apartment), auditions for the lead in her all-time favorite musical "Funny Girl," which is conveniently being revived on Broadway. During her callback, she imagines her fellow Glee-clubbers singing with her and she gets the part.

Hey Mr. Arnstein, it doesn't work that way. While this is undoubtedly moving and tear-inducing (especially since in real life, this was filmed just months before Cory Monteith's death), no 19-year-old nails her first big audition in NYC--and especially not in her favorite musical.

To make matters even less realistic, Santana, Rachel's high-school rival turned roommate (just go with it), is her understudy. As much as we all imagine Broadway as a real-life version of high school, it isn't. If it was, we all might start taking up singing lessons so we could have our rivals be our understudies.

Rachel turns down a topless scene

In a realistic turn, Rachel gets the opportunity
Photo Credit: FOX

In a realistic turn, Rachel gets the opportunity to act ... in an NYADA student film. And the film is called "Come Back To Me, Grandmother: A Journey Into Alzheimer’s." Unfortunately, that's the end of the realism.

Kurt reacts badly to a topless scene (in student film?! Kurt, is this your first rodeo?), and then calls in Quinn and Santana to talk her out of it. They are successful, and Rachel refuses to do the topless scene. Nudity in student films is practically a given, and being cheered for turning down a role is just insane. This is New York, we even have nudity on the Broadway stage.

Getting a new tattoo for free

As millennials, it's hardly surprising that Kurt and
Photo Credit: FOX

As millennials, it's hardly surprising that Kurt and Rachel want tattoos to signify their new lives. The storyline is only missing Instagram in terms of being realistic. Kurt inks "It Gets Better" and Rachel (seemingly) backs out. Oh Kurt.

While that is entirely realistic, Kurt accidentally gets "Its Get Better" and, that's right, somehow convinces a New York City tattoo artist to just give him a new, free tattoo.

The tattoo is changed to "It's Got Bette Midler," which Rachel accurately describes as "genius and it makes absolutely no sense" which could actually be used to describe the entire series.

In a sad, sweet tribute, Rachel did get a tattoo: Finn. Oh, Rachel. Crying at "Glee" is unfortunately realistic for all of us.

A model walks out on Tyra Banks

This episode featured realistic commentary from Kurt about
Photo Credit: FOX

This episode featured realistic commentary from Kurt about New York ("The city’s huge, the buildings are huge, and everywhere you look there’s all these beautiful people who seem to just come from some secret meeting where they teach you how to make it in the big city").

There were some comments from Tyra Banks that were on point, such as when Sam asked, "You think I'm fat?" and her character, Bichette, says "Not for Kansas."

But Sam refuses to lose 10 pounds, despite Bichette's advice that "emaciated is very in right now."

That's right, an aspiring male model walks out on one of the biggest companies because he doesn't want to lose 10 pounds. Sam has not been banished from New York for these comments and even continues to model. Oh well, at least we get to look at his abs frequently.

A 19-year-old unknown has a script written for her

After a rough year, Rachel finally catches a
Photo Credit: FOX

After a rough year, Rachel finally catches a break when screenwriter Mary Halloran writes a script about Rachel's life. While a random 19-year-old aspiring actress is New York City is not exactly script material, that's not even the least realistic part.

Her friends hate it (which they would, but out of total jealousy, not because it doesn't sound like Rachel), and she sings for Mary and gets her to rewrite the script.

The power of song is an ongoing theme in "Glee," so it's not even worth it to dispute this point, but what executive would ever rewrite a script based off an unknown 19-year-old?

And then Rachel, the girl who always wanted to live in New York, abandons our city for L.A.? Don't tell Chloe Sevigny.

Rachel leaves NYC after just one failure

The Rachel-the-TV-star storyline gets redeemed at the start
Photo Credit: FOX

The Rachel-the-TV-star storyline gets redeemed at the start of the sixth season, when the pilot is so bad it gets the network president fired. Dejected, Rachel returns home to Lima, Ohio, having given up on her dreams.

Wait, what? This is New York. If there's anything we have, it's the ability to pick ourselves up, failure after failure. Those cracks in the sidewalks are the same as the cracks in our souls, but they make us strong.

Of all the unrealistic parts of "Glee," having a New Yorker return home after ONE failure could be one of the worst. Dear writers, please have Rachel return to NYC in the finale, learning that going home to lick your wounds is not what we do.


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